THE END

Life is a collection of different phases. One ends and another begins. Some are pleasant, others are not. In some, you meet new people, interact with them and soon develop a strong attachment. While in others, you drift apart from your close ones and who were once a part of you.

Just like every story has an ending, similarly this blog of mine too has reached its end. ‘STEPS’ has lived its life, served its purpose and delivered what it was intended to do. Now it stands with its back towards me, all bags packed and ready to go. I didn’t ask why, just blinked my eyes to say goodbye.

 This blog started as a random thought that occurred to me one day. I decided to give it a shot, not sure whether I’ll be able to pull it off. But within days I was writing furiously, jotting down every thought of mine. It gives me immense pleasure to write something creative.

With this blog I have shared some moments that have touched me, some lessons that meant a lot to me and some questions that provoked thought but couldn't find the answers. I will miss this dear friend of mine who made me think each day in a different way and has kept me awake late in the night trying to get that ending right.

As the last day of the college ends, this blog takes its last breath. Soon a new phase will begin. A different scenario will be opened up with new things to learn. I’ll proceed with whatever I have learnt during the 4 years of college life.

One day I made a pledge,

to live life on the edge.

I won't escape the excruciation,

even if it led to my double differentiation.

I know that there would be mistakes, 

but they’ll only raise my knowledge stakes.

I’ll give the odds a good fight and in the end,

I’ll have my bite and would break the fast late in the night...

The Book Shop

There is something about bookstores that attracts me. Probably it’s the childhood fascination which still has a strong hold on me. Last month I happened to visit a particularly old bookstore in Connaught Place, New Delhi. As a child I used to come here often. Then I grew up, and physics and chemistry textbooks replaced comics and novels. 

As I entered the shop, an old woman was sitting at the cash counter. I smiled at her and she nodded back in acknowledgement. Over the time I have realised that these simple gestures of courtesy can give you access to 15 to 20% discount on your purchase. I, being an opportunist, didn’t want to lose any chance of getting one. I noticed the long wooden bookshelves towering over me from all sides and went straight to the fiction section. “Chanakya’s Chant”, I read the name of the book and picked it up. After going through the overview I decided to go for it.

Going through the shelves I came across biography section. Now this is one area that I am not too fond of. Try as much as I could, but half way through someone’s biography or autobiography and I run out of patience. I have read Mahatma Gandhi, A.P.J. Abdul Kalam, Khushwant Singh, Lee Iococa, Warren Buffett and Richard Branson. In each one of them I ended up skipping the latter half. With full enthusiasm I used to start these books but in the middle they would get so slow and boring it would make reading each page impossibly difficult.

There was a little girl with her father in the children section. She was picking up books from the shelf and her father was holding them for her. With a pile of books resting against his chest and supported by his arms, he proceeded towards the cash counter and the little girl trotted behind him. Memories from the past flooded me at that instant and I flashed back to my childhood days when I used to get Rs.200 as monthly pocket money. Back then Goosebumps, Famous Five and Hardy Boys were my favourites. Each used to cost around Rs.100. So I had to save that much amount of money by month’s end in order to buy one book. It means I had to limit my spending to Rs.100 per month. Considering the cost of one cadbury dairy milk chocolate to be Rs.10, I could afford only 10 such chocolates in one month. It was tough, fighting against one’s desires. I had a fairly decent collection of story books back then. Me and my friends, we used to exchange our books on a weekly basis and read.

Moving on I came to the classics section. Two old men with white moustaches were sitting on the chairs kept on one side. One of them was wearing a hat, had a walking stick in one hand and a P.G. Wodehouse book in the other. He looked like a retired army colonel to me. They were discussing about books. I couldn’t help but over hear them. “The best part about books is that they never perish. People may come and go but books are passed on from one generation to another. They never fade away, they become classics”, one of them was saying.

I went to the cash counter with my book. “How much for this book?”, I asked. She took the book from my hand and saw the price which was Rs.200. “Rs.120”, she said. I gave her the money and came out of the shop. She had given me 40% discount. I turned to face the shop again and saw a banner on the side glass that read:

“Closing Down Soon

 40% OFF on all books.”

 I looked inside the shop and saw the woman sitting. It was only then that I recognised her. She was the same woman who used to be there when I was a kid. She looked at me and smiled. Probably she recognised me or probably she didn’t.

Revolutions 2020 – Book Review

Whenever there is a mention of Chetan Bhagat, every Indian reader’s ears are likely to pick up for a second. Like his previous novels, in Revolution 2020, he takes up an issue that is concerned with youth of India. This time he has probed into the lives of students preparing for IIT and AIEEE entrances.

Set in the heart of Varanasi, this book does manage to get the readers hooked from the beginning but gets highly dramatic towards the end. The pace of the novel is fast with twists and turns coming every now and then. Such is the Chetan Bhagat style of writing that he makes sure every Indian is able to relate to his characters somewhere or the other.

The protagonist, Gopal, is a person from lower middle class family, has a girlfriend, Aarti, from a much higher status and a close friend, Raghav, who is much better looking and more intelligent than him. The plot unfolds when all the three are preparing for their engineering entrance exams and proceeds forward explicitly giving an account of their emotions and thinking. As always, Chetan Bhagat has chosen an underdog as his lead character. Probably he does it so that the majority readers could relate themselves to him. But this time around he portrays the central character in a grey light. Gopal is shown as ambitious, impulsive, immature and corrupt, which can make some readers averse towards him. Many hot issues concerning India are taken up, such as corruption, scams, political pressures, etc.

The starting of the novel is good, where he writes about the love life of Gopal, problems associated with it, and the troubles of a student life. But when he tries to strike the patriotic chord of the reader by mentioning the situation of India, he falls back.  And in the end he screws up when he adds the melodramatic twist for no particular reason. Chetan Bhagat has given all the right ingredients for making a saucy Indian movie. Hopefully we’ll be watching this book turned into a Yash Raj movie sometime in the near future. 

To love or not to love?

She stood before me with her arms resting on my shoulders. Her eyes had the truth that she had chosen me to walk with her till the end. I placed my hands around her waist and bent forward to press my nose against her forehead. It’s moment like these which makes you feel that nothing is wrong with life, as if you have been washed off of all the sufferings. I closed my eyes and placed my lips on her neck. Not a word was spoken, not a word was required. It’s like those moments which you dream many a times, which you only wish were true. She smelled of fresh fruit cake, which you just want to devour in one big bite.

And then it happened. All of a sudden, when I was least expecting it. Pain shot through my left cheek as she slapped me hard on the face. I opened my eyes, startled at what I saw.

My two roommates Mohan and Ratan were on top of me in my bed in our hostel room.  Mohan grabbed my shirt collar and wagged my neck as if I was a dog biting into his leg.

Mohan: Wake up, quick!!

I: Huh! What’s happening (rubbing my cheek, which was red from the slap).

I slowly realized that it was indeed just another dream, like many before.

Ratan: Shit happened man!!

“Yes, with you, it always does”, I thought to myself. I checked the clock for the time, it was 1AM.

I: F**k off b*t**es and let me sleep.

Mohan: Ratan had proposed to Gary this evening and now her boyfriend, Sam, knows about it and is hunting for him along with his gang.

At this point, Ratan started to wail uncontrollably.

Ratan: Help me out! I don’t want to be hurt!!

I: Sam, who? Sam Gamgee!! No worries, he’s just a hobbit. Invite him over to supper sometime; he’ll make a truce with you.

Ratan: (wiping off his tears) No man, not Sam Gamgee from Lord of The Rings, but Sam Bugati, the guy who runs a drug racket in college.

Mohan: Yes, and I've heard he’s responsible for the scar on Hari Singh’s forehead.

Ratan: (blowing his nose every now and then).

I: Okay, so this guy Sam Bugati is after you because you were after his girl?

Ratan nodded his head. Suddenly there was a bang at the door. The three of us looked at each other.   And there was another bang, louder this time. “Open the door”, someone shouted from outside.

Ratan: It’s him it’s him.

His eyes were horror stricken as if he was about to meet his doom.

Mohan: Ye toh kaand ho gaya (This is total blunder).

I: Alright, Ratan, you go and hide in the cupboard. I’ll see what I can do.

Mohan went to the door, unbolted it and pulled it open. Two guys stepped inside the room. One was short, stuffed up and had a wicked expression on the face. His name was 'Hilas Anna', and the other one was Sam Bugati, tall, bearded and with stern expression on the face.

Anna: Are you Ratan?

Mohan: I am not Ratan. I already have a girl. I don’t even look at others let alone asking one out.

Anna: K, man, lucky bastard you. Wish I had one in my life too.

Sam: Hey man, where’s Ratan?

At this point I got up from my bed and said, “He’s in the bathroom I guess”.

Sam: K, just tell him to stay away from Gary. Alright let’s go Anna.

I: Wait a minute. That’s it? Don’t you feel like kicking him in the balls or something? Or at least hurl abuses at him?

Sam: Nah man. I broke up with that b*t*h a long time ago. She used me when she felt the need and later shooed me away as if I was a dumb schmuck or something. I mean is there no true love left or what. Today I do drugs so that I can forget her. Look what she made me.

And he started wailing noisily.

Anna: God knows what she found in that South Indian scumbag that she left poor Sam all by himself.

Sam Bugati: Just warn Ratan to watch his back. He might end up screwed, just like me.

With all said and done, they both began to leave when Anna suddenly stopped besides the cupboard. He sniffed it’s door and let out a yelp, “chocolate cookies!!”. And with one flash of lightning, he opened the door. Out came Ratan tumbling, with his mouth stuffed with chocolate cookies and empty rapper in his hands.

Ratan: Cookies anybody?

Anna: It’s empty.

Sam Bugati: Just like my heart.

Love, it’s a strange thing. Some dream of it, some have suffered permanent wounds because of it, while others enjoy it unquestioningly till the end. On this road of love, one faces everything- happiness, treachery, bliss, resentment, contentment, misery, hope…

So, the question is- To love or Not to Love?

A Distant Dream

Have you ever dreamed of having something?

Ever thought of being somewhere?

Ever longed to be someone...

A dream/ a thought/ a longing so strong, that it starts to possess you. Day and night it defines you, governs you, and makes you strive for it. What follows is a strong conviction that you too can win.

I would consider myself fortunate,

if each step I take has a purpose associated with it;

if each moment lived has a feeling attached to it;

if each laugh of mine is the  result of ten cries,

and each cry has a vision for that last laugh.

And even if I discover that I cannot win today, let me try to move ahead knowing that I can lose.

Let me set sail today against the winds and let me drown the day it becomes calm,

because that day I would have no reason to move forward.

In the end, the mind weakens;

                memory fades;

              & money becomes useless.

All that remains is a glimpse of what you were. And that picture cannot be photo shopped. It has to be clicked right, the very first time. Just like a painting drawn on the canvas.

There were days when I doubted myself,

                when I truly believed I could not do something,

                                        could not be somewhere,

                                        could not become someone,

Those days were reality. Then one night, I started dreaming and got lost in the infinite ocean of possibilities, fighting against the tides.

Let’s all take a step today, to dream like there is nothing left to say,

And the day will come when we’ll open our eyes to a new reality which once was a distant dream. 

Chetan Bhagat at Symbiosis

Don’t just have career or academic goals. Set goals to give you a balanced, successful life. I use the word balanced before successful. Balanced means ensuring your health, relationship, mental peace are all in good order. There is no point in getting a promotion on the day of your breakup. There is no fun in driving a car if your back hurts. Shopping is not enjoyable if your mind is full of tensions.

Life is one of those races in nursery schools where you have to run with a marble in a spoon kept in your mouth. If the marble falls, there is no point coming first. Same is with life where health and relationships are the marble. Your striving is only worth it if there is harmony in your life. Else you may achieve the success, but this spark, this feeling of being excited and alive, will start to die.

One thing about nurturing the spark – don’t take life seriously. Life is not meant to be taken seriously, as we are really temporary here. We are like a pre-paid card with limited validity. If we are lucky, we may last another 50 years. And 50 years is just 2,500 weekends. Do we really need to get so worked up?

It’s ok, bunk a few classes, scoring low in couple of papers, goof up a few interviews, take leave from work, enjoy with your friends, fall in love, little fights with your loved ones. We are people, not programmed devices. 

                                                       Don't be serious, be sincere.

The Day when I was GOD!!

Let me tell you a story. Since I am the creator of this story, it makes me the God.

Once upon a time I created a guy named Mr Wrong. He never appreciated what I had to offer him. He was always complaining about things, always trying to find faults in other people (who also were created by yours sincerely). I mean, couldn’t the guy ever say that how fortunate he was to have this or that or some other thing. I gave him a house but that had to be too small for him, a job that he said and I quote “it pays me peanuts”, parents that were too interfering for him, and friends that were too well off than him. I even gave him a girl but he pissed her off with his constant whining and she left him. This guy, Mr Wrong, has shooed away anyone who has ever loved him.

And then one day, you won’t believe what happened. Mr Wrong somehow found my address and showed up at my doorstep, with an axe in his hands.

Mr Wrong:     Look God, either you change the script of this story or prepare to die this instant. (Raising his hands high up in the air)

I:     Dude, would you put that thing down. It’s scaring me.

Mr Wrong:     Hey you are God. You are not supposed to be afraid, remember.

I:     Well, it’s not about what I am supposed to be, it’s about what I want to be. (Smiling now)

Mr Wrong:     Huh! Whatever! I don’t want to be Mr Wrong anymore; I want to be Mr Right. Please make me Mr Right.

I:     Very well then, your wish shall be done my friend. But remember, “Wrong is as wrong does”.

And with that I clapped my hands two times and there was light all around. Mr Wrong covered his eyes with his arm.

When he opened his eyes he was standing in a sprawling mansion and had all the luxuries that one could ever dream of. I gave him a fleet of cars; I gave him a million dollar industry to run, a beautiful wife, and good friends. So our Mr Wrong should now feel contend with all that I had to offer. Day and night he was occupied in running his business because now he wanted to turn it into a billion dollar enterprise. Suddenly million dollars were not good enough for him. He worked by day and toiled by night. He had no time left for his family. He avoided his friends who were not rich enough for him. He was constantly on the run, from one place to another, signing deals making new contacts but not keeping a track of the old ones. His wife left him, fed up of being continuously neglected. In the name of his friends he now had money minded colleagues and associates but none with whom he could share his feelings and thoughts. His parents were long gone from this world.

He cried in isolation in his office realizing the fact that was now his life. There was not even a shoulder to cry upon, just a billion dollar enterprise to cover up for the things that he had done.

And that’s when he heard a knock on his door. The door opened by itself and there I stood, at the entrance dressed in a white coat and pant, with my hands tugged inside my pockets, legs in a crossed position and my left shoulder rested against the door entrance. I removed my shades and walked towards Mr Right with shades in the right hand and adjusted my hair with the left one. My entrance was applauded with a clapping sound in the background. Mr Right looked up with his tearful eyes.

Mr Wrong:     Hey God, you were right.

I:     About what, me playing the character of God??

Mr Wrong:     Nah, you are still lousy at it. You were right about me being Mr Wrong.

I mean, I should have known that it’s not about where you want to be in life, it’s about how you get there which is important. Today, I can’t even stand the face in the mirror.

I:     Great, now you complain about your aesthetic beauty?

Mr Wrong:     Come on God, you know what I mean. Today, despite of having everything that a person could wish for, I have nothing.

I:     K, cool, but there is one problem. This story cannot have a sad ending, but you are sad. So we have got to do something about it. I mean, being God I cannot allow things to end up screwed.

So I clapped my hands twice once again, and once again there was light all around and once again Mr Wrong covered his eyes with his arm. But this time when he opened them, he found himself back in his old small home, with his friends, girlfriend, and parents by his side and also the same old job which paid peanuts. He looked up in the sky and winked. But this time he chose to be Mr Right because he had the right attitude.

That was Mr Wrong turned Right who learned his lesson the hard way. Let’s learn something from his story and gain something out of it. 

A must read - The Monk Who Sold His Ferrari

Last evening I was going through my collection of e-books and that’s when I came across – “The Monk Who Sold His Ferrari”. After one whole night and the entire following day later I completed reading it. One of the most thought provoking book I have read in the recent times. Language is fairly simple, not very tough, easy to digest by almost anyone. The plot opens in a courtroom, where a lawyer named Julian Mantle is fighting a case and in the middle of the trial he suffers a heart attack. An extremely high profile and successful lawyer like himself somehow couldn’t enjoy the fruits of success in his personal life. His wife left him, his daughter died in a car accident, stress has taken a toll on him and misery is at its peak. Yet to the world he is this charismatic person who has dinner with actresses and drives a Ferrari.

The heart attack comes as a wakeup call for him to see what he was turning into – a lop-sided man with all the riches in the world but a huge void inside. He could buy all the luxuries from the money but he couldn’t purchase happiness. So after recovering from the heart attack Julian sells all his material possession including his Ferrari and sets off to India in search for some answers. His journey, to know himself and his purpose in life, takes him to the Himalayan Mountains in search of a group of monks known by the name of ‘great sages of sivana’. These monks were known to have found the deepest secrets about life. They lived more than 100 years of age and could slow their heartbeats on their own will.

This book is about the teachings that Julian Mantle receives from these monks on life, on habits, on thinking and transforming oneself. And these teachings could very simply be adopted by any person who so ever. From doing simple things such as reserving 10 minutes before and after your sleep to contemplate about oneself daily, admiring the beauty of a rose for a few minutes daily, being in competition with one’s former self rather than others, appreciating time and spending it efficiently, cultivating one’s mind like a garden and allowing only positive thoughts to enter it, self-restraining, self-improvement, to a whole lot of things, this book covers it all.

The conclusion that one can draw after reading the book is that moving along the path of achievement and success don’t compromise on your happiness. It’s a must read for all those who want to inculcate a change in their lives by doing very simple yet meaningful things. And the very fact that these philosophies seem so very effective is what makes this quite a useful book. One doesn’t need to leave his home to go and live in the mountains when such immense knowledge is right before us. Glad to read it at this particular time, and this makes me believe that when a person is ready the teacher finds him.

The Bad & the Good

Times. Good times and bad times. Somehow we all have this tendency to classify time in these two categories. How many times have we said that, “my luck seems to be going against me” or “it’s one hell of a time”. These lovely bad times that we all hate so much, have a nag of showing up at our doorstep ever so often. They seem to enjoy seeing us miserable and exhausted. So what can be considered as a bad time? I can list a whole lot of examples from my personal experiences and from what I have seen. An accident on the road, failing in an exam, being rejected in an interview, problems in a relationship and eventually being dumped, which seems like the end of the world (at least it seemed so to me).

But what we tend to forget is that, bad things don’t just happen automatically. I mean, they can happen suddenly, but the reason lies somewhere within us. Probably we were not cautious enough while crossing the road and got hit by a vehicle, or didn’t study at all and were bound to flunk, were not confident/presentable/suitable enough for the job, so had to face the door, or were a complete jerk to him/her and so deserved being dumped (and no it’s not the end yet, there are many jerks out there suitable for us). What I am trying to say over here is that, most of the time (99%), we are responsible for things not going quite right. Like Sylvester Stallone said to his son in the movie Rocky, “Stop pointing fingers at others and saying – you ain’t what you wanna be because of him or her or anybody. Cowards do that and that ain’t you, you’re better than that.”

So why do we hate these bad times so much? Well, because each person likes things to go his or her way. That means we have created a comfort zone for ourselves. When we are made to leave that comfort zone, then it causes discomfort/frustration/irritation. Fact is, that we cannot avoid these times, because, for the expansion of our comfort zone, it is essential that we first step out of it. And in the process we extend our limits and really get to explore ourselves. Running away from these times is pointless because ‘you can run, you can hide but you can’t escape these times’.

Barack Obama, in his book- ‘Audacity of Hope’ says, “My father left us when I was 2 years old. My mother and I, we were very poor. But she gave me an education and most importantly she gave me HOPE.” Hope has the power to light up even the darkest corners of hell. Hope can bail you out of any treacherous situation. If we are willing to hope then somehow a small window will definitely open up for us. So harbour hope, have faith even when you are biting dust, times will change, you will rise and see the sunshine.

Please Don't Stop The Music

Dedicated to all my fellow NOXians. You complete me.

And then the last song played.
The moment I had been dreading all the while had finally come. If only one could seize moments and revisit them once in a while. Now there would be silence once again. Just to let you know, silence is not a bad thing in itself, but once you get accustomed to the music, well, then it's tough, pretty tough.
You are left helpless, because once the beat starts playing, you just can't stop yourself from dancing to the tune.

There was too much chaos. The crowd was leaving, people back stage were packing stuff, shouting , congratulating each other, hugging, laughing. And I just stood there and watched as to what I had become, as to what I was made into. If there was a museum to display a person's most precious moments, then this moment would have to be my Mona Lisa. What had happened in the past few days was something beautiful. The time shared together, moments lived together, jokes cracked together, food eaten together, and some more food and some more... it was amazing!! Each second to be cherished by one and all for the times to come.

We worked, we played, we fought and formed an everlasting bond of friendship.
I was living very peacefully before all of this and then you all came and flooded me with emotions, struck me with chaos and disrupted my silence. And Thank You for doing that, because if it wasn't for you all, I would never have learnt to face the thunder and would have compromised with the everlasting silence.

And now its over. Everything has come to an end. Now there would be silence once again. But this time I won't compromise because this time I have you. I won't let you go away from me, ever. I guess it's better to drown in chaos with you all rather than rest in peace alone. Because one day I lost something precious and people close to me know that I don't make the same mistakes twice.

Failure just an idea... Really??

Read an article in HT yesterday that said ,'success and failure are just figment of one's imagination'. These two words - success and failure are mere ideas that we have picked up from the society we live in. They lack originality and substance. That they has been engraved in our mind right from the very beginning and we should learn to go beyond them and not be restricted by them. In the article there was an example of a beggar getting the opportunity to eat in a 5 star restaurant as a big thing for him and a matter of success. It also said something like 'success is nothing but walking with a smile on your face even through the darkest corners of hell', and that end motive of one's life should be moksha or something like that.

But cummon, who are we kidding. I mean, ya, the article was very good, motivating indeed,  but only for a person who is struggling in life and not for others. The thing with philosophy is that, its good as long as you lose. But when you start winning it seems bullshit. Who in the world would like to stick to mediocrity entire life? I think that each one of us can be categorized to be in either of the 3 situations -
1.) Failing badly, struggling to make ends meet. Disillusioned and lacking vision. No clear aim in front of you.
2.) Having a vigor to move towards one's aim and fighting for it. Sure of your aim.
3.) Satisfied and content. Feeling finally successful. Aim attained.

The article I read would only be beneficial for the 1st category of people, helping them get over their failures and moving past them. But when it comes to 2nd category of people, it won't be of much help because in a way the article is saying 'stop running after success, it's a piece of crap!!' What the 2nd category people want is something to boost them up, something that could add fuel to their fire. As far as the 3rd category of people are concerned, well its hard to say because I have been successful in installments for very brief period of time. Whenever I find success, something new comes up and I get along on it, so I can't really say what's their mindset like and whether they would be affected by the HT article or not.

Hard core philosophy can be very fatal. It can make you land head first on the floor. So better use it cautiously and dilute it with your own ideas.
Do one thing, all you people out there, know what category you fall in. If you are a 3rd category person then good for you, enjoy , party!! For the second and first category people, just keep such motivational stuff handy, you might need them from time to time. Just mold the theories according to you, what suits you the best. Play by your choice, mix the philosophies and add your own stuff and form your rules.
All the best!!